[ROVERNET - UK] Presbyrtarian Rovernuts OT
rovercar at comcast.net
Tue Feb 5 04:10:47 GMT 2008
David Sheuring wrote:
> Now now......I am Presbyrtarian...so where does THAT
> put me, because I haveers......any ideas?
Presbyrtarians hold beliefs similar to Presbyterians except that they
reject the authority of Webster's Dictionary and insist on spelling
words in any manner that "feels right" to them. The Living God guides
their choice of letters and what order the letters are written in. The
dictionary has no authority, and Webster was in league with the devil.
It's mostly just a rejection of the authority of the written law, and
really has nothing in common with Speaking in Tongues.
Orthodox Presbyterian Rover owners are strict Calvinists and believe
that God has already predetermined how the universe will unfold. You can
tell a Calvinist Rover owner because they tend to not perform a lot of
preventive maintenance on their cars since God has already determined
when, where and if their Rover will break down, and nothing the Rover
owner can do will change that. Well, that is, unless God has already
decided that they should have maintained their cars according to the
factory service manual. Presbyrtarians diverge somewhat from
Presbyterians in that, as mentioned earlier, they abhor reliance on the
written word and often eschew what's in the Rover factory manual for
advice and rumor gleaned by reading the Rovernet. Over-reliance on the
Rovernet has been a thorn in Almighty's side for some years now since it
generally causes problems in the way God's universe unfolds.
David, you'd better say your prayers and try to not mess up the universe
by not sharing that crummy blue TC with your fellow Rover guys.
More information about the rovernet