[ROVERNET - UK] Presbyrtarian Rovernuts OT

[Glen Wilson]

David Sheuring wrote:
> Now now......I am Presbyrtarian...so where does THAT
> put me, because I haveers......any ideas?
> David
Presbyrtarians hold beliefs similar to Presbyterians except that they 
reject the authority of Webster's Dictionary and insist on spelling 
words in any manner that "feels right" to them. The Living God guides 
their choice of letters and what order the letters are written in. The 
dictionary has no authority, and Webster was in league with the devil. 
It's mostly just a rejection of the authority of the written law, and 
really has nothing in common with Speaking in Tongues.

Orthodox Presbyterian Rover owners are strict Calvinists and believe 
that God has already predetermined how the universe will unfold. You can 
tell a Calvinist Rover owner because they tend to not perform a lot of 
preventive maintenance on their cars since God has already determined 
when, where and if their Rover will break down, and nothing the Rover 
owner can do will change that. Well, that is, unless God has already 
decided that they should have maintained their cars according to the 
factory service manual. Presbyrtarians diverge somewhat from 
Presbyterians in that, as mentioned earlier, they abhor reliance on the 
written word and often eschew what's in the Rover factory manual for 
advice and rumor gleaned by reading the Rovernet. Over-reliance on the 
Rovernet has been a thorn in Almighty's side for some years now since it 
generally causes problems in the way God's universe unfolds.

David, you'd better say your prayers and try to not mess up the universe 
by not sharing that crummy blue TC with your fellow Rover guys.